i told our photographer that she had her work cut out for her.
we recently added a new child to our home...
We try not to do things for atleast a month when we add a child to our home.
For multiple reasons...
to give the child a chance to adjust...
to give them a chance to get through the honeymoon stage...
to give us a chance to, well for lack of a better word, bond.
Most foster children like to go to anyone at anytime for anything they need or want.
[which is opposite of what your bio children will do which is come to their parents first.]
in their minds..if they don't like the answer they get from their foster mom or dad just wait cause our environment could change...by maybe just going to church...
or going to the store...
Fosters look for these times...they depend on them...
its there way of not having to deal with their new parents...not having to bond to them...and not letting them attach themselves to them...
so they don't have to have their hearts broken again...if and when they are moved around again.
Its there way of building up walls...and getting what they desire.
and I get that.. i really do. but its my job as a mom to change that.
to show them they can trust us. to show them we love them. to push past the attachment issues and hug them even when they may seem standoffish.
I have seen this in every placement we have had.
Its so hard.
Hard on the foster.
Hard on the foster parents.
Hard on the bio kids.
its just hard.
But if you can get through this initial stage it...some only takes a month...some takes up to 6...it just depends on the child...but if you can get through this the rest of there time[which could be their entire childhood] in your house will be more normal.
so with that in mind...our photographer had her work cut out...but she did a beautiful job.
Our family photos include our new placement because well that is our family at this time. yes we have some without..but we left that up to the photographer. i have a feeling if we did our family photos now the pics with "K" in them would be even more precious...you would see more of an attachment which he does have with us now..but that is the beauty of pictures..while situations change around you...that pictures doesn't change...it was our "now".
hope you guys have an amazing weekend...
Euchre totals will be up soon.
Totally overwhelmed by our friends response to give.
with a thankful heart.
Gina
we recently added a new child to our home...
We try not to do things for atleast a month when we add a child to our home.
For multiple reasons...
to give the child a chance to adjust...
to give them a chance to get through the honeymoon stage...
to give us a chance to, well for lack of a better word, bond.
Most foster children like to go to anyone at anytime for anything they need or want.
[which is opposite of what your bio children will do which is come to their parents first.]
in their minds..if they don't like the answer they get from their foster mom or dad just wait cause our environment could change...by maybe just going to church...
or going to the store...
Fosters look for these times...they depend on them...
its there way of not having to deal with their new parents...not having to bond to them...and not letting them attach themselves to them...
so they don't have to have their hearts broken again...if and when they are moved around again.
Its there way of building up walls...and getting what they desire.
and I get that.. i really do. but its my job as a mom to change that.
to show them they can trust us. to show them we love them. to push past the attachment issues and hug them even when they may seem standoffish.
I have seen this in every placement we have had.
Its so hard.
Hard on the foster.
Hard on the foster parents.
Hard on the bio kids.
its just hard.
But if you can get through this initial stage it...some only takes a month...some takes up to 6...it just depends on the child...but if you can get through this the rest of there time[which could be their entire childhood] in your house will be more normal.
so with that in mind...our photographer had her work cut out...but she did a beautiful job.
Our family photos include our new placement because well that is our family at this time. yes we have some without..but we left that up to the photographer. i have a feeling if we did our family photos now the pics with "K" in them would be even more precious...you would see more of an attachment which he does have with us now..but that is the beauty of pictures..while situations change around you...that pictures doesn't change...it was our "now".
hope you guys have an amazing weekend...
Euchre totals will be up soon.
Totally overwhelmed by our friends response to give.
with a thankful heart.
Gina
2 comments:
How did he react/what did he do when your family took pictures without him? Just curious!
He was just fine with his portion of pictures...he had toys to play with when it wasn't his turn...
amanda really came prepared for this shoot!
Post a Comment