Right now I'm reading Crazy Love by Fancis Chan. What an amazing book. I've learned a lot reading this. I know for my life, all I want to do is please my Lord. He is why I live where I live, why I do what I do everyday, HE is my everything. But I am human. I do screw up, fall short every single day, have feelings(heavens to betsies!) and emotions(wow, watch out now) and guess what...I am who God has made me. I don't desire to please Gina every second of the day. People see me that way. It hurts. Today I don't know how to handle that. I am constantly giving it to the Lord, but honestly there are days where I just want to give up. I feel like I try so hard to please God, to please my husband, to please my kids, to please my family and friends....For all of it to fall short. I hate screwing up. HATE IT! Honestly today is one of those days where I just say come quickly Lord Jesus!
This morning during my devotion I was reading in Jeremiah 7:6 that says "if you do not oppress the stranger, the fatherless, and the widow and do not shed innocent blood in this place or walk after other gods to your hurt.
v.7 then I will cause you to dwell in this place, in the land that I gave to your fathers forever and ever. "
A couple of things I noticed there which I know is not really in context of this verse but I underlined the walk after other gods to your hurt, its interesting what our hurt will cause us to do. Usually it is things we would not do, run to places in our mind that we would not normally, places in our mind where we would say "No that is off limits". Which is probably why the enemy (who might I remind you all is alive and kicking hard!) uses our hurt. I pray against this and for strength from Jesus because I am weak! Also this entire verse 6-7 reminds me of how Gracious God is! How many times did he tell this to the Israelites and to Judah? Verse 5 He says repent! Repent and turn towards God. See this is God's work, not our human finite minds work. We can not cause a person to change their ways or be someone different no matter how many dirty looks or come to Jesus meetings we have with people. God is God and we are not. Praise the Lord! God is Love, we can Love, we can...WE need to choose to. He commands us to.
Speaking of love...
There's a little girl I'd love to Love. Her name is Anika, she is HIV+ and I see her sweet face and want to just scoop her up and Love on her. To show her Jesus!
She's in Russia!
You can find her here....
For those of you who think WHAT?! She's HIV+ ....its actually a very livable disease in the U.S. Not so much in other places like Africa. Unfortunately because she has HIV the possibilities of her being adopted are not great. SO sad. But with God all things are possible. I really do want her! Pray for me. :)