Saturday, June 2, 2012

as i sit...my heart is...

As we sit here and take off from Detroit headed to new York...we have tony and the boys on one side of the isle way and em and me on the other...I started reading a blog and it just hit me. [ I was holding back the tears.] This is happening. [!] A year of planning and praying..i just couldnt believe words like seeing the pyramids and and flying 11 hours from new York to Egypt were leaving my mouth.. And then another 4 hours to Ethiopia! Many things raced through my heart...I was thankful that my husband was not fearful to walk this path god has clearly mapped out for us. Thankful that my husband is asking god and listening for his response for our family...and to be responsible enough to save money from each paycheck to be able to pay for this trip. Thankful to god for his provisions [through friends donating $$ to your prayerful hearts for out family]for every detail of this trip..like our luggage weighing in at 49.7lbs and a few at 50.0lbs exactly..and for light hearted humor with the men at southwest airlines putting his foot on the scale saying it weighed in at 76lbs..the look on Tony's face was like WHAT?[priceless!] How'd we do that?! And the guys laughing at their own prank...
Overwhelmed I became...and am.
My heart... joyful!
Our kids next to us and following a plan that He set before us.
There's nothing like doing the lords will.

I'm gonna own this...I'm a fearful person. I hate change. I wish i didn't. I wish [mrs.good with change] was my middle name...but sadly it's not...it's more like Gina [weeny] Giraud!
This last week I've had a million and a half fears...what if, what if, what if....and this morning as the lord woke me early...I prayed for every detail I could imagine...and then I spoke [4] little words that seem so easy to come out of most mouths but really are so difficult to leave my mouth...
Are you ready to hear them...
i trust you lord.
I heard a little voice in the back of my head say "how'd those words taste leaving your mouth"?
But honestly i am, i do.

My[our] faith in him is producing an action. See years ago my faith wouldn't have produced this action. It would have burdened my heart but then i would have left it for someone else to do. Surely the lord doesn't need me to do it, he can find someone else that is "called"or better yet "qualified. I believe our time in flint was preparing us for this. Sometimes painful seasons in our lives produce a fruit in us that we did not see at the time or understand what it's for...But god had/has a plan for all that pruning he was doing in my heart....and still continuing to do.
Well that's it for now.
Love you all!
gina

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